Concern
Mrs. Kajal came to our FCC/VSV office and lodged a complaint on her missing husband, Mr. Shashi, who has been missing for over a month, and after a month of searching for him she found him in Bengaluru and now he refused to go back and live with her.

After their marriage, they moved to another city to start their new lives.

(Names changed to protect identity)

Therapy
The husband, Mr. Shashi, was called for questioning and counselling and so were his parents and the female client’s parents as well.

Summary

  • As per Mrs. Kajal, she and her now husband had a few years of courtship before they got married early in 2015 against the wishes of both their parents as they belong to two different Hindu community. After their marriage, they move to another city as they did not want to continue living in Bengaluru.
  • Everything was fine for them up until 9 months of their married life.
  • One fine morning about a month ago, she released that Mr. Shashi did not come back home from work. She was worried and lodged a missing complaint in the city that they used to live. Mr. Shashi’s phone was switched off. Mrs. Kajol tried to reach him on every possible medium of communication. But it was all in vain.
  • Then she came to Bengaluru a few weeks ago, and went to his house and enquired whether he had come back home, initially Mr. Shashi’s parents who are her in-laws as well, said they knew nothing about him as he had married against their wishes and asked her not to come near their house ever again.
  • But Mrs. Kajol did not give up, and she kept looking for her husband.
  • She later realized that he was staying at his parent’s house itself, and when she questioned him about why he was putting he to such emotional misery, he refused to give an answer and only stated to her that he will come back to live with her, asking her to forget that they ever knew each other.
  • She was devastated, and she run helter-skelter trying to get him back.
  • That is when Mrs. Kajal came to our Women’s helpline for justice.
  • Shashi was called in and so were his parents.
  • After further counselling and discussions, it was learnt that they have had a legal court marriage. But Mr. Shashi is a few years younger to his wife and his parents are not only objecting the fact that their son married a girl from a different caste but is elder to their son as well.
  • We counselled the parents as now Mrs. Kajal is their legal daughter-in-law, and they requested for some more time to accept this.
  • Shashi and Mrs. Kajal have consummated the marriage, so even if they wanted to mutually separate, it has to go through the legal system.
  • Kajal’s parents were also called in for counselling and discussion.
  • Her parents were ready to accept Mr. Shashi as their son-in-law.
  • Everybody was counselled, and Mr. Shashi was told about this being a legal marriage, he lawfully has to live with his wife.

Conclusion

  • Both the families agreed to take some time and accept each other.
  • In the meantime, Mrs. Kajal was referred for medical/psychiatric attention as she has been very stressed and has became severely depressed.
  • Both Mrs. Kajal and Mr. Shashi were recommended for followup counselling sessions.